I’ve just got back from two weeks in Chile and Easter Island

While I was there, I met a number of other couples, all of us had booked through the same travel company

And when we compared notes, it became clear why

They listened

One couple told me they now always travel with this company because they trust them

That’s what listening does, it builds trust, loyalty, and relationships

It reminded me of a sale I lost years ago, and a hard lesson in what happens when you hear, but don’t listen

The company I was selling to had built a clever business model in a niche market

In the UK, if you crash your car on the motorway, the insurance company will often write it off

But this business realised most of those vehicles could be repaired and sold at auction, turning what others saw as waste into profit

When I met the CEO, he told me they were looking for a new ERP system to support their growth

And during that meeting, he gave me one very clear piece of advice:

“Don’t ever call the cars we pick off the motorway scrap. They’re our raw material.”

Crystal clear

We agreed to a demo of Oracle Financials

I brought in a pre-sales consultant who met with the Finance Director, Head of Operations, and Head of Procurement. Each of them said the same thing:

“Whatever you do, don’t call the cars scrap.”

We did a dry run, rehearsed everything, and felt ready

Then, on the day of the demo at Oracle’s UK HQ in Thames Valley Park, 30 minutes before the client arrived, the pre-sales person said, “We had a rethink last night — slightly different angle on the presentation.”

My heart sank

Within the first 30 minutes, as he walked through his new “solution” on the whiteboard, he said the word scrap seven times

Seven

I watched the CEO and my newly created sponsor, go pale

My sponsor kept glancing at me

I could feel myself turning red

At the break, the CEO said he had an urgent customer issue and needed to leave

We never heard from him again

The pre-sales team thought the demo went great

They even complained to my manager that I wouldn’t follow up on the deal

But the truth was simple: the deal was gone the moment we stopped listening

Conclusion:
Listening isn’t just about words, it’s about respect

When someone tells you what matters to them and you ignore it, you don’t just lose the sale, you lose the relationship

We often think sales is about persuasion, but it starts with something much more powerful: listening, and proving you’ve heard